“They want your vol-au-vant! … How’s that for a title?” said QAnon’s agent: “How does that grab you?… Kind of like Count Alucard does it in the mirror!” The Hollywood producer raised his eyebrows… “And there’s this great scream moment in a supermarket where a women with two kids panics in horror when she sees QAnon and says as if it will be the end of the world: ‘He won’t be a faggot!’ … it could be life-changing.”
The agent was trying to sell QAnon’s new script scenario – all based on fact – but it was no title… It was the truth! And QAnon was in danger as it was past midnight and the local Underworld were out in force waiting outside his apartment complex as he was about to spill the beans on what he discovered after living in that damned complex for nearly 25 years… The wolves had been circling for well over a decade like some sort of Yakuza as they let themselves into his apartment and wondered about the Black Rain (1989) poster and why it had sat there unmoved for years and years blutacked above his television… The wolves were to meet another wolf… but, hell, misery loves company…. So yes, it was his vol-au-vant they were after and not because it tastes good at parties but because it’s a symbpl of purity and sacredness, it was not profane – it was real! Anyone whose been shafted knows that!! There’s no going back once you’ve had another man stick his cock up your arse! And it drove some of them mad… mad enough to kill using psychic powers most of us wouldn’t necessarily understand or want to understand…
It was QAnon’s vol-au-vant, if not to eat but for them to stick their pork sword up – QAnon shuddered at the thought… “Is that all that you want of me? To butt f*ck me and then leave me for dead? Irretrievably insane? My cherry popped? Ultimately, they wanted QAnon dead from the humiliation…” But we’re skipping ahead. QAnon is not insane – just yet or at this moment.
Over the years the people changed in the building where QAnon lived. What was once an old demographic of war widows had now passed to an older generation including one family which seemed to be buying up all the apartments and who himself seemed to have a key. QAnon was a bit like Gene Hackman in The Conversation and amazed that changing the locks didn’t help… there was no locksmith to be trusted or so it seemed…
Anyway, QAnon had learn about the secret library of L’Enfer in Paris which apparently contained keys to the black arts including the use of ‘bad’ L’Enfer upon people like himself…. What drove people to use bad L’Enfer – jealousy? – I guess so. Let’s call the people who do not like QAnon and those who use the black arts on other people as ‘they’… They are scum and they are that spitting sound… They are the rich people who read minds to make rich business deals, they are the broken hearted also who cannot find their way in life and who instead turn their powers on others who are not ‘gifted’ with the power of L’Enfer.
Imaginary magician and satanist Bobby Marshall speaks about L”Enfer: “People don’t really realise about L’Enfer and how it affects day to day lives…. It can mean as little as spilling a hot coffee on your wrist when your rude to a barista… and this happens, there are people who have certain powers you know…. Do you sometimes get a ringing in your ears, does it come and go? Don’t you sometimes wonder who causes that ringing? It’s not necessarily caused by something wrong within your body…. And all those people who get bad heart palpitations or feel that their heart is being interfered with like someone has a pair of scissors or whatever…. These are minor complaints and discomforts…. Those who have the powers of L’Enfer can hold their neighbours at their mercy… They can even make you choke on your own vomit when you overdose on say alcohol…. I know that’s what Q’Anon encountered. Poor bugger … I hear he also had his dick in his hand.”
Private Investigator Moke Blue: “QAnon was about to spill the beans on that conspiracy. He found that people with L’Enfer skills and ‘bad M’ if you want to call it that happily will kill those they find unworthy in their eyes. It is a delusion born of jealousy and Catholic guilt and shame… And poor QAnon was found to be unworthy by one particular neighbour… Poor QAnon was found dead with his dick in his hand and a bottle of wine in the other – he had choked on his own vomit.”
“Yes, you’ve told us that three times,” said the Hollywood producer.
”Well, I thought we could restage his death scene kind of like the fat guy who ate too much spaghetti in that Brad Pitt serial killer movie. We all know QAnon loved spaghetti.”
But back to the apartment complex and like Maude Eburne said over the ouija board in The Bat Whispers (1930): “Russian!”. They had a couple of kids and one of them was a boy was about ten or twelve years old. They were ‘gifted’ as QAnon learned… The walls and doors were thin… QAnon had been researching L’Enfer and the fact that certain men and women can read thoughts…. This he discovered when some nasty neighbours nearly drove him – well, actually I guess they did drive him insane – through their amplification of his thoughts. And QAnon didn’t know the extent of the conspiracy around him… Until then QAnon had remained ignorant of the art of thought reading by other people and it was perhaps that which had marred his life and love life…
He found related movies to be Suspiria (2018) in terms of projecting dreams Nightmare on Elm Street (1984,2010) style… Yes, bad L’Enfer includes giving people bad nightmares too. QAnon’s research into the psychic realm also included viewing David Cronenberg’s Stereo (1970) which showed how omnisexual practises happen all over the place including at night time… And then it became obvious that QAnon was missing out on some sort of black mass all his life while all alone he tossed jism away.
To quote QAnon that well known bisexual or AC/DC personality, whatever, and very dirty old man: “I went to the movies the other day to see the new Emma Thompson film and sat in the back row while there were about four other women in the cinema… As the movie started, I got the feeling of wanting to project dirty thoughts into the audience as I felt a presence… To my surprise I got an erection and a rather good one at that… I had been a while! There was a psychically receptive woman in the audience. I thought of my cock and its shape and size and her caressing it and various forms of foreplay… I even jizzed in my mind and hopefully hers before I went through the exercise twice more. “He doesn’t want a third offence” she said to the other girls in the cinema… It was a boring movie otherwise. You know what she said about ‘they’? “They only know and want money.” I never even saw her face… So, there you go, the black arts in the cinema during a mid-week morning session.”
Something was not quite right in the complex as the mother of the boy was overheard by QAnon complaining about someone in the complex being interested in boys. QAnon had first learnt about good L’Enfer from this family and he couldn’t help but overhear as the mother taught her children to play ‘the game’ much like in the movie The Other (1972). This was the beginning of QAnon’s education in the so-called black arts or really what today has become an everyday part of life for some people. He didn’t know all about bad L’Enfer at this stage and while it was okay to project dirty thoughts in a cinema… the first time, he tried to project a thought, much to his embarrassment the children were home next door and receptive to the thoughts. Someone let out a scream. Oops. QAnon thought it was bad enough that he had been caught having a wank in his apartment with heavy breathing perhaps one time too many already… That night the neighbourhood went crazy and cars started racing by like some sort of crazy Monster’s Ball… QAnon had been targeted as some sort of pedo, or so he thought… a ‘nutter’ at least… but there were worse things he would learn… Anyway, he didn’t think he deserved this treatment as he abhorred the practise of molesting children along with general poking of vol-au-vants even of women. But I guess if you get carried away it’s all right to have anal sex. I find it a little sacraligous. It’s really for, well, you know… buggers!
The thing was the people who had turned on QAnon included his sister and brother-in-law who were connected somehow to the underworld in QAnon’s neighbourhood and the people who lived in his apartment complex. They had sentenced QAnon to four months in the locked ward over a simple dick pic… QAnon also deduced that there were several neighbours who were also ‘in on it’ and they would laugh and use the paranoia card to drive QAnon to the edge and unhappy to the point where he would drink copious amounts of wine each night to the point of overdose… That’s why he was found dick in hand, you know?
“You’re obsessed with QAnon’s dick!” said the Hollywood producer.
“Isn’t everybody?” said the agent.
“Personally, I prefer my own” the producer played with his cigar.
It was a danger for QAnon as he was depressed and was already planning his own suicide… Instead, he self-medicated…. Unable to actually do the deed. As one neighbour lay in wait. This neighbour he would learn had ‘bad M’ … He wanted QAnon dead so the world would reach full Zee or something of that nature… Apparently the world would be a better place and not on the road to kaput state it is now… You know all we’ll end up is a dead red planet like Mars? And our souls … well, keep it!
This bad neighbour had the common power to start the ringing in the ears of QAnon and there was a neighbour above him who was a good-looking teenage boy who had enjoyed omnisexual experiences with the evil one. The evil one knew his ‘boyfriend’ could use heart palpitations as a sort of discomfort on others as a part of his bad L’Enfer gift. Poor QAnon suffered from these attacks wherever he seemed to go somewhere where he was unwanted… There was always someone evil… some bugger who wanted a piece.
When this teenage boy and his mother or sister moved out due to the bad element in the apartment complex the evil neighbour obviously had no-one beautiful to have an omnisexual experience with… He moved onto the Russian boy who I suspect had a protector in the flat to sleep with at night… if he hadn’t already visited the boy in the wee hours then he planned to… But his real goal in life during the day was to wish QAnon another overdose… He was jealous of the writer and didn’t like the fact he was you know, cut, while he and QAnon’s brother-in-law planned a new world together as the Garden of Eden would thrive and the whole world would be uncircumcised… because “everyone says so” and “they don’t want Allah” …Personally I like a bit of variety… but I’m a bit of a girl.
Anyway, said brother-in-law turns up a second time one night – he made an appearance during the Monster’s Ball with all the aplomb of someone who only does the Madison (Jimmy Durante’s Hello I must be Going comes to mind as he left and returned to annoy QAnon as he tried to sleep in the midnight hour) – and this guy has a conversation with said neighbour. The voice of the brother-in-law is unmistakably but to his folly he let himself be caught consorting with those who wished others more than just ill will. To me that sort of collaboration in unforgivable… Meanwhile the evil one wished this sick demon QAnon to go get his berth in hell since tonight he would use his bad L’Enfer to make QAnon choke on his own vomit.
“Hells Bells” thought Tintin.
He’d been trying and trying but this night he hopes to succeed and put the Earth back on the wonderful track record it has recorded this past fabulous century…. Well, I guess it’s great to have goals in life and the ‘couple’ parted after a few quick changes (Durante again) which they found amusing with death on their minds all in the name of full Zee in the Garden of Eden and to watch The Horses video starring Daryl Braithwaite replay over and over in their family photo and video collections.
“All you win is One Summer!” sang the evil one through his window about the alternative Daryl Braithwaite song. QAnon had already sung the silly twisted boy gay but it didn’t stop the fixation… as long as QAnon was there it would be to the death.
QAnon took his overdose but was once again saved by the magic potion known as Eno. It is a remarkable magic potion. He had already inhaled some vomit a couple of times but survived like a drowning Nirvana baby…
The thing is about these bad M or bad QAnon types is that if you take a clinical look at them in that state of wanting to kill you and you can see they are actually serious and have an idee fixe and that perhaps they are totally insane like Peter Lorre in M (1930). They live in a world of their own.
To quote QAnon: “There are those who have major powers in terms of bad L’Enfer that verge on the ghostly… I remember a time I was housesitting in Adelaide and there were a group down the road who seemed a bit rough but I had a funny feeling about them… The girl I housesat for said never lock this lock on the front door at night…. Well of course I did and that night I had a ghostly visitor or visitors who pressed me face down and said: “I’ll make a real man of you” and I couldn’t move I was so frightened until I felt the presence leave… They actually weren’t there at all and that’s the frightening thing. It was kind of like the ghosts from The Fog coming to visit… It was kind of like dreaming you are being buggered in your sleep but there’s no one there… No wonder people believe in ghosts but it is some kind off unexplainable entity in terms of L’Enfer.”
Mysteries were solved that night QAnon’s brother-in-law gave into full collaboration… and it was a couple of nights later that QAnon was trying to get to sleep when he could hear the neighbour groaning and it sounded like a girl… Now QAnon being a dirty old man thought this might be all right and so he started directed omnisexual thoughts … towards this girl as he once more risked dying dick in hand.
“He prefers something more Greek” said a woman’s voice and as it turned out he was doing it over the Russian boy in terms of omnisexual sex as far as I could gather… It was his bent this possible killer of ‘little blondie’ as they called the ‘child QAnon’ once was and appeared in photos. Such is the link between child killers and killers and their criminal insanity…. Well, is it only a thought crime? Or is the bent permanent once a certain line has been crossed? And who consorts with such people on cold dark nights? Anyway, such is omnisexual practices with children in your neighbourhood… When the boy made it clear to his family that he wasn’t going to take it anymore from the neighbour they threw a party and called him a real boy even though this boy knew something too about the strange goings on in the block but wasn’t telling.
Anyway, QAnon had an epiphany and thought to himself he might write an article about solving these goings on… But he was being watched and spied on by the L’Enfer of the Underworld through spyware who answered the call that night also of the ‘bad M’ which was living in the complex … They knew through reading the mind of QAnon that he was going to write an expose albeit he died with his dick in his hand and a bottle of wine in the other!
“He won’t obey!” said the apoplectic leader of the gang who for a moment almost turned purple. He was afraid he would be revealed … the horror of AC/DC and real men.
QAnon thought: “Oh well, here we go again” as the midnight streets of a Sunday Black Sabbath were filled with what he guessed were unsavoury characters… QAnon was never one to prejudge as he liked people in general. He couldn’t help but like them… They are all misunderstood like QAnon often is. But as for ‘they’…
“And you know what? A funny thing happens. Total turn of events….” said the agent waving his bits of paper in the air. “Qanon isn’t an android, he doesn’t raise himself from the dead…”
It turns out the leader of the mob outside was a kid he went to school with. Yeah, he was a bit rough and could be seen as a bully… But this was the very kid who let QAnon fondle his willy in a sleeping bag at the school camp: “I had a stiffy and you didn’t” QAnon reminisced later using thought waves to speak as the voice he heard in his head was no longer one of the boy he knew but now one of nicotine and hard living. It was perhaps not going to be a rotten night after all … As the ‘killer’ neighbour was placated and the child confessed all to his parents about those who let themselves into his mind and QAnon’s apartment. The ‘killer’ knew gang outside and he had inadvertently tipped off everyone by inviting the ‘respectable’ brother-in -aw over… If there is a lesson to be learnt about the quest for a vol-au-vant, it is that sometimes one can be too many…. It’s only AC/DC and some men cannot help but think of other men while they still prefer women. But it is often in a certain way.
“How’s that for a story?” said the agent “I’ll sell it to you cheap…. We could get Jim Caviezel as QAnon, he’s got those beautiful eyes and you know what? We could get three blondes for the girls in the cinema that QAnon had the omni sex orgy with… You don’t need much special effects! We’ll get leather jackets specially designed for the bad guys.”
And so, ends the story of QAnon and how he discovered he was not an insane pedo but there are those out there that want to kill him and won’t leave him alone and like to think he is one!
QAnon said: “I stayed up late one night to write an article about it all and woke to take a pee about 8am. I went back to bed having had two hours sleep and I thought of the boyhood friend with psychic powers from years ago who had finally paid a kind of visit. I pulled the covers over myself and tried to sleep but knew I wouldn’t … I felt an invisible hand pull the cover a little higher…”
It was a moment of reassurance. You cannot damn the guilty as they damn themselves.
